Stephen Hawking says “There is no Cod”

Cod is Dead ... and Deep Fried

British physicist Steven Hawking has claimed that “There is no Cod.” He believes that "science offers the most reasonable explanation" for Long John Silver's decision to remove Cod from their menu.

Hawking suffers from a motor neuron disease similar to ALS, Acute Limey Syndrome. He’s English you know. Part of the treatment for ALS is a daily serving of fish.

Hawking does believe, however, that "Tartar Sauce is Absolutely Divine," an allusion to a possible deity-like entity capable of producing that tasty condiment so necessary for the enjoyment of a nice piece of fish.

Professor Hawking announced that due to the removal of Cod from the menu, he will “Never again set foot in a Long John Silver’s restaurant.”

Stephen Hawking divorced his first wife, who took care of him and guided his wheelchair everywhere. When asked why he divorced her, he said, “She was just too pushy."

Bob Simpson

Bobsimpson1947@yahoo.com